Today Liz, my friend, neighbour and owner of the vintage store The Arthur gives her perspective on what a mum needs on the second go-around of motherhood. Thanks Liz! When I became a mother for the first time, I needed to read, review and get every possible perspective on how to be a ‘good’ mother. Your whole world changes becoming a parent. It’s irritating to say it because it’s so redundant. But I’m sure that’s why you generally receive a big old WELCOME TO THE CLUB cheer when most friends and strangers find out you’re pregnant. The parents that have made it through to the other side are excited to have a new recruit to bitch and complain with (because it is your DUTY to do so once you enter the club)!
The great thing about baby #2 – is that you’ve got the confidence of mothering. Now you can finesse the details. You know when to be really concerned (fevers, continual projectile puking, abnormal lethargy, etc.) and you when not to be (sleeping, crying for longer than 2 mins, sneezing, blinking, etc.)
So, for you Emma – I have created: Liz’s FINESSED list of MAMA THINGS (that made life easier with 2 kiddos).
#1: The BAG that says: “Hey, I’m a big bag that does all the things a diaper bag does without being a diaper bag”. First time around – I was committed to getting an official diaper bag. I was so damn proud that I was a mama that I wanted that big diaper bag to wave around like a big old mama flag. .. Not so much anymore. Just get a bigger bag like this sweet Geoff McFetridge illustrated Makr bag and travel in mama style.
#2: STORAGE. You will absolutely not have the time or energy to arrange and sort all the books, toys, bottles and other baby detritus that seems to spring out of every corner of your life from here on in. My one & only trick is: good storage! Store that biz. Hide it! Do whatever it takes to make it go away!
#3: SCARF/SHAWL. My love of scarves began when I was learning how to nurse. Nursing began as an awkward, fumbling, ordeal that I thankfully hid behind a scarf. Once I’d mastered the skills to feed the lil’s (har har), I ended up just loving having a scarf on hand. It hid the spit up stains and made me look like I actually thought about what I was wearing.
Food. The toughest decision in our day. What are we going to eat? Makes me crazy. Keep it simple, eat this!
#5: DONE IS BETTER THAN PERFECT. It’s not the most uplifting/pretty thing I’ve ever heard but these words are TRUTH. I did this little DIY project a while back because these words are what get me through most days with 2 kids. The work load is pretty unbelievable. There’s no time to return the pillow that doesn’t quite match the throw on the sofa, just keep it. I won’t judge you. And I won’t judge you if you’re ‘outing’ for the day with the kids is walking to the grocery store and back. That sounds pretty perfect to me.
Image credits: 1- Makr 2 - Caitlin Wylde's house 3 - Virginia Johnson 4 - Everybody Likes Sandwiches 5 - Liz Ikiriko